It would appear that Simon's recent hints about walking away from X-factor has all been part of an elaborate poker game with ITV. It does appear to have paid off for money bags though because he has got ITV to make him an offer of £24m to stay with he channel. That you buy him plenty of 'T'shirts and sun-glasses.
Perhaps there should be a national campaign to raise £24m to pay him to bugger off to a desert island instead.
The X-factor producers didn't think Cheryl would be up to travelling abroad with her acts this year so they have found her a very big luxury house in Poole in Dorset. Whilst Cheryl is probably a bit miffed about having to stay in this country I'm hoping that this means I might be able to go a long and stay with her and assist her in sniffing out the acts that really stink. I'd love to spend time running a long on a Dorest beach chasing stones and sticks.
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