Could Ash return to Arsenal?

With Thierry Henry heading back to Arsenal could Ashley follow in his footsteps? The Arsenal fans hate him but I'm sure that if the money was right Ash would be interested. Whilst Chelsea have too many old players, Arsenal are crying out for players with experience.

What will Cheryl do in 2012

After a very low profile in 2011 what has next year got in store for Cheryl. You will know she has hit rock bottom if she ends up on some silly celebrity show like Big Brother or I'm a Celebrity. I suspect she will relaunch her singing career but with a slightly different style.

Time for musical Chairs at the Bridge?

With their title chances already down the pan is it time for AVB to pension off the old guard and replace them with some young guns. Ash could be off to the states along with Frank and John, Nicholas is off to China and anyone else over 25 needs to start looking for a new club.

Slow news day.

You know it must be a slow news day when there is a story in the paper about Cheryl taking a spare pair of flat shoes everywhere she goes. That's not bloody news it's simply Cheryl being practical.

Ash and the boys threw away more points on Monday only managing 1-1 draw with Fulham. It looks like the premiership is now heading to Manchester.

One more sleep til Christmas.

I can honestly say I feel like a dog with two dicks today. Christmas is just one sleep away. Hopefully I'll get something really special from Cheryl to make up for the fact that I've hardly seen her this year. I wonder if Ash will have sent me anything this year he usually sends me a gift just to try and compete with Cheryl for my affections.

Honours even

After a hard fought match Chelsea finished up drawing 1.1 with Spurs. Not a bad result all told and Ashley helped set up the Chelsea goal.

Terry in the Dock

Looks like Ashley may be teaming up with a new defender very soon with John Terry being with racial abuse. Isn't it funny how both a Chelsea player and a Liverpool player likely to miss a lot of matches this season. Any one would think the FA are trying to give a few favours to Manchester United.

Army wives shoot own Cowell

Simon Cowell's effort to grab the number one spot have been twarted by a choir made up of army wives.

What will I be getting for crimbo

I've been having a sniff around but so far I've not managed to find any clues about what I might be getting for Christmas. Either it's very well hidden or else it's not be bought yet. Cheryl's mum is a very canny shopper so she is probably waiting until the last minute to grab a real bargain. I'll be very disappointed if I end up with a plastic toy again even if it does resemble Simon Cowell!

Who needs equations?

Scientists at the University of Bristol have come up with a 'hit potential equation' that can predict how stars, such as Adele, could get a top five hit with 60% accuracy. You don't to bother with all this science stuff all you need to ask is 'Is Simon Cowell involved?'  If Simon backs a single you know it will get into the top ten because he makes sure all his records get maximum publicity by getting them in the papers or giving them a guest spot on X-factor.

Is Cheryl heading planning to enter strictly.

I've noticed that Cheryl's mum has been taping every episode of Strictly come Dancing for Cheryl. Could this mean Cheryl is planning on becoming a contestant next year? I'm sure she would love to take part in the show especially if it continues to beat X-factor in the ratings, she would dearly love to stick two finger up at Simon Cowell in front of over10 million viewers.

Time for a clear out.

Looks like the old guard are about to start existing Stamford Bridge. Anelka has already agreed to go to China, Drogba wants to go as well and Terry and Lampard could also be heading for pastures new. It will only be  a matter of time before the younger players start to refer to Ashley as grand-dad.

Has Cheryl got a toy boy?

Several papers claim that Cheryl is getting it together with a toy boy who is only 21? Sounds as though he's another dancer. Why does she keep falling for dancers? She needs a real man not a bloke who dances for a living.

Cheryl  has told a magazine that her style changes every day, some days she wants to dress like a "hippy" and other days a "spaceship" sounds like she has started early on the Christmas sherry.

Ashley in trouble again.

After keeping a low profile for a few months Ashley seems to be creeping back into the news again for all the wrong reasons. He's been accused of taunting Manchester City fans after Chelsea beat them on Monday. Surely a bit of Mickey taking is part and parcel in football so why are the City players making a big deal out of it. May be a lot of Ashley's taunts were a bit lost in translation given that City seems to have recruited players from every corner of the world. I'm sure that it will be no skin of Ashley's nose if he has managed to make a few extra enemies in the football world.

Think again Dermot

Dermot O'Leary reckons most men like him because he's not very tall and he's ordinary looking. How does he know that? Just because people don't go out of their way to slag him off doesn't mean that he is well liked. I think most men must look at him on TV and say 'I could do that. In fact they probably say 'I could do his job better than him and for a lot less money.'

Raise a glass to Sarah

One of Cheryl's former band mates has given an interview about her battle with booze. After coming out of rehab Sarah now wants everyone how hard it was to give up drinking. She could at least have waited until after Christmas before revealing all about her drink problem, the next 3 weeks is all about drinking so no one wants to read about people giving up drinking.

Little mix win it.

The writing is now on the wall for Girl's aloud with Little Mix storming it in the X-factor final.  Is the room in the charts for two girl bands anymore? Little Mix are younger and sexier that Girls Aloud so Cheryl and Co. will have to raise their game or throw in the towel.

Amelia's gone.

Amelia the come back kid has finally bitten the dust. Earlier this week there were claims that the show was fixed for her to win so it is probably just as well she got knocked out. She wasn't very special she just seemed different because she manage to dodge the first five shows of the televised shows. The remaining acts are fairly boring so I don't think I will waste any time tuning in tomorrow.

Pulling out all the stops

The X-factor production company are pulling out all the stops to generate some interest in Saturday's final but it largely seems to be falling on deaf ears.

X-factor Snub

X-factor producers were planning to attract a host of top stars to duet with the finalists but it looks like most of the top stars who were approached gave the idea the thumbs down. So there has been a quick rethink and now the finalists will sing with their mentors instead. Given the quality of the finalists this year the viewing figures are likely to be poor, I think I'll watch strictly instead.

Bad night for the Mancs

After Arsenal and Chelsea lead the way last night in Europe Man City and United stumbled tonight. United were undone by a second rate Swiss outfit and Man City got knocked out despite winning their match against Bayern Munich.

Who is Imelda Marcos

According to a number of papers Cheryl has become the new Imelda Marcos. It seems that Imelda had thousands of pairs of shoes just like Cheryl. I really don't know why Chezza is so obsessed with shoes because when I see her she usually only wears slippers or trainers. I really can't see how she has had time to buy 2000 pairs of shoes let alone wear them. She must have bought most of them over the Internet.

Ash and the boys had a good win tonight to ensure they sail through to the next round of the European Champions league, hopefully this means they have turned the corner and it will be win, win to the end of the season.

Tulisa says sorry.

After Misha B was voted out of X-factor Tulisa has finally apologized for branding her a bully. Shame it took her so long. Misha was the best singer in the competition but she has been ousted due to false rumours. The producers will have to pull out all the stops on Saturday to breath some life back into a competition that died on it's feet when Johnny was eliminated.  Surely the public won't be happy if Amelia wins the entire competition having managed to dodge five live shows. She is a fairly average singer and if she had performed every week people would have got bored with her by now.

Poor Misha

Sadly the only good singer left on X-factor has been booted off. After 6 weeks of bad publicity it should come as no surprise that she has finally gone. Next weeks final is probably going to be the weakest final that there has ever been in the shows history. None of the three finalist have got any chance of being an international hit. They might just manage to knock out a couple of albums if they are lucky but in two years time they will have disappeared without trace.

How dire.

Tonight's X-factor was probably one of the most dire of the series. At least two of the acts cocked up and the other two were lackluster. None of the acts have improved while being on the show and some even seem to be going backwards.  The judges must have realised by now that none of the remaining acts have got the X-factor and however hard they work they will never gain the X-factor because people are born with the X-factor it's not something that can be taught or acquired.

Simon throws a wobbler.

Looks like Simon isn't getting his own way on X-factor in America, he stormed off in a huff last night when one of the acts was booted off the show against Simon's wishes. In this country the judges did what they were told but in America it looks like the judges are more highly strung.

Poor Gary

Gary Barlow has been moaning that he's not enjoying being a judge on X-factor. What a hardship it must for him having to work a couple of nights a week on a £1m contract. May be if he had not booted out so many good acts the show might be more enjoyable for him and the viewers. Perhaps he's just getting his moans in now in the hope that Simon might offer him more dosh to to appear on next years show.